Gifted

I've never blogged about this topic and few people actually know about it.  I'm not sure why.  Yes, both my children have been identified as gifted.  Why do I keep that a secret?  Some of it is that fear of what other parents will think and say.  Some of it is that they'll think I'm being braggy.  I know of very few parents in the town where I live who have gifted children.  I actually know of very few people anywhere close to me that have children who are gifted. 

Navigating the world of giftedness is interesting.  In my state there is no funding.  They get gifted services but not as I'd like to see it.   Why is being gifted a bad thing?   These children are going to be the leaders of our world one day and frankly we're doing them a disservice by not acknowledging that they are gifted.  Not enough is done on research for gifted students.  Would a different type of schooling be beneficial over another?  We already know giving them more work is not the answer but yet a lot of schools do just that. 

I'm in no way saying what teachers do is wrong.  I'm saying that I don't think teachers are educated on how to teach a gifted student.  How do I know that.  I'm a teacher and I'm currently taking classes for my teaching degree.  We've touched a few time in a few classes about gifted students but not enough for me to be able to teach them in an effective manner.  I'm not even sure what would be the correct course to take for teachers but honestly something has to change. I'm just not sure how that would happen.

So here I am a mom of two children who are gifted.  I remember when my daughter was identified 2 years ago I was a mess.  I knew very little about raising a kid who is gifted, I know very little to this day and my son was identified just a few weeks ago.  Somehow I have to navigate them through life and teach them that being gifted is not a bad thing, that being gifted is fantastic and yet I am also ashamed to admit to anyone that my children are gifted. That seems wrong too.  How is it okay that I'm telling them "Fantastic, you're gifted, that's great" and yet in secret I'm hiding it from everyone.   It was actually a little harder to hide with my daughter who skipped part of kindergarten and went into 1st.  I'm sure the teachers had an interesting time explaining that to the kids.  My daughter also had a habit of blurting out that she was gifted and there I was going "Shh, shh" again probably not okay. 

So where are the support groups for parents who are dealing with this?  I found a few online but really some of those groups are rather intimidating.  I don't want to share my children's scores, I've seen questions about them reading books that I can't imagine my children would enjoy at their young ages.  I want to talk to parents about what it's like to be a parent with children who are gifted.  I want to talk to parents who have done it successfully.  I want reassurance that I'm not going to screw them up.  What I really want is to be able to connect with people who feel the way I do and who feel that it's something they have to keep a secret from everyone else.   I want to talk with moms who have figured out how to balance challenging their children and yet let them be children.   My daughter loves to read books that are for her age group and though she does read other books that are more her mental level, I'm not going to tell her that she can't read the books she enjoys even if they are not as advanced. 

I worry that I'm messing them up.  Are they in the right school?  Are they getting all the enrichment they need?  Are they happy?  Are they doing to many activities?  Is letting them be and act like kids hindering them in anyway? 

No less than about 7 times while writing this post my son was over at my desk asking for my help with the game he's playing (Plants vs. Zombies).  So sorry if my thoughts are a little jumbled but I always feel spending time with them, even if it's just to help with a game, is very important.  I want them to know they can come to me for anything, from video games to much more complex things. 

I'm a normal mom who's just by chance raising children who are gifted.  I want the same for them that any mother wants for her children.  I want them to be happy, healthy and safe.  I want them to be proud of who they are, to be respectful, to make right decisions, to be good people.  I want them to be a productive member of society as adults and to reach for their dreams. 

So why am I so scared to admit they're gifted?  It's a good thing.  Maybe if I could admit it I'd find other parents in my community that are going through the same things.   Maybe I could figure out how to advocate change and get funding and services that they need.